Supervillain Me
Claire wants to turn the light on, but she cannot reach the switch. She reaches and stretches to no avail. I decide to help her out by reminding her of some tools designed for just this purpose. Her potty chair doubles as a step-stool for brushing teeth, and would be a perfect step-stool to reach this light switch.
“Claire, go get your potty. Bring it here.”
She gives me a quizzical look, but is good natured and trusting, so she fetches the seat.
I prompt her again, “Put the potty under the light.”
Again, the quizzical look, but she complies. Before turning back for more instruction.
“Now use the potty to reach the light!” I proclaim in my ‘you-done-solved-it’ voice.
She seems to shrug as she follows my instructions by opening the potty chair, sitting down, and stretches for the light, ever farther form her goal.
She is confused as her parents laugh at her attempt, even though it was at their behest. Ok, one more hint kid.
“Stand up, close the potty, and stand on it.”
She complies, and looks at me hopefully yet again.
“Where’s the light?”
Reach, click, cheer. Repeat.
Sometimes, even with all the help in the world we still have no freaking idea how to use the tools we’re given. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, even if the experts around you occasionally laugh when the light bulb doesn’t pop on for you right at once.
Just keep reaching. That’s what we keep telling ourselves over here.
(This post composed under the ambiance of a strobe light show. On-Off-On-Off-On….)
July 2011
10 posts
Something really gross just happened to me.
Seriously, it’s pretty sick, so don’t read it if you get grossed out easy.
I’ve had this bump on my face for ages. It’s just that, a bump under the skin. I never really thought much of it. Some people just have bumps places.
This one is right on the top of my left cheekbone; kind of near the tear duct, but sitting on top of the bone.
I’ve had it for ages. I know it’s not something I was born with, but I can’t place the time in my life when I knew I had it or didn’t. It was kind of like having my wedding ring. Now that it’s on and a part of me I never think twice about it until I’m really looking at my hands or something.
Well today I was looking at whatever on the computer and I was picking at my face a little. Just feeling the stubble and bumps and checking for any zits while casually browsing the internet. I found the bump and perhaps I squeezed it a little. Nothing intentional, just gave it a bit of a poke/prod/pinch.
Instead of acting like a bump, a lump, a chunk, there was a small release of pressure. I looked at my fingers and saw a bit of puss. That had never happened before. Odd. A smell of something nasty wafted over my sense. It was definitely coming from the puss.
That’s not supposed to happen with normal zits, so I pinched again to check. More puss, more stench. This was getting weird.
I headed off to the bathroom to get a visual on the old lump. I saw a small pore open wider than normal right at the base of the lump, so I gave the lump a small squeeze.
Puss gushed from the hole in my face.
The pungent ribbon leap from my cheek onto my fingers and didn’t slow. I re-positioned after my initial squeeze and really gave it a big, thick pinch. Puss came pouring from the pore and the stench of dead flesh crept into my nostrils. What was this?
Pinching and pinching, wiping and washing. I pinched, wiped, washed, repeated for a few minutes. Emptying the small but (apparently) dense pustule embedded in my face. I suppose I just never thought about what was in the lump, or what it might be doing. The answer, I now know, was fermenting puss.
Finally the flow stopped. I had repositioned my fingers multiple times to get the puss out from many angles. now there was nothing but a red mark where I had been pinching at the lurking goop.
Now I sit and type at the computer with an emptier, smoother face. There’s literally an empty spot in my skin where the offending soup sat. I can rub the skin and it is loose like a popped blister.
How long was it in there? Behind my face lurked something foul. I had a dream about just such a thing ages ago. Years literally. Perhaps ten years ago I had a dream about a pustule in my face filled with evil. the dream was so vivid that I still recall it to this day. I know exactly where I was too. Quite strange.
Maybe this is simply a fear or stress manifesting in physical reality. Who knows?
But isn’t that the question in general? What is lurking behind your face? What’s in there? can you get it out? Sometimes you just need an outlet and a bit of pressure, and before you know it the evil lurking in your face pours into the world in a ribbon of…
So a mouse crawled into the Air Conditioning system in my car and died. Now it’s rotting in the guts of my vents. It doesn’t stink until you turn on the vents/AC/heat.
It’s been about 90 degrees lately, and it’s a challenge to remember not to blast a savory gust of rotten mouse stench into my eyes and mouth every time I get into the car.
I told one of my more handy friends about my problem, hoping he’d have a solution. He did of course. But he gave me a sigh and talked blah blah blah about how hard it was going to be to tear it apart and find the offending carcass.
I suggested a number of alternative solutions. Let’s examine the 3 more foolish ones.
- Blow my leaf blower into the A/C vent to blow the mouse out
- Leave it until winter when it will freeze and hopefully it will decompose by the time next spring rolls around
- Leave the car parked outside with the windows down in hopes a snake or something will creep in and eat the carcass
I don’t exactly have a pithy lesson or observation. Other than my ideas are bad and stupid, but I tried one and 3 anyways.
Maybe I should just get some fresheners…
I love woot.com.
Here’s the thing with woot though. You don’t know exactly what you’re going to get, but you can make some guesses. Woot tends to have great deals on lots of things, but they sell them because they, themselevs. found great deals. Sometimes this means a really cheap deal on a really cheap product.
Other times the quality is great and it happens to be a killer deal for all involved. I’ve had about an even amount of both experiences. I can’t say I’ve ever been displeased with a woot purchase, but I notice that sometimes the cheapness of the product shines through.
What is a good deal? Is it getting a low price on some crap you kind of want/need? I the past this has always been my main focus. Is the price low? Can I afford it NOW?
‘Now’ being the key word.
As I’ve gained a bit of expendable income beyond that of a college student I find myself debating whether the cheapest product now is worth it or if it’s more valuable to pay a fair price for something that’s guaranteed to have a higher quality.
It’s the issue of quality.
Last summer I bought a used tractor lawnmower from my neighbor. I knew the guy was handy, so I assumed he kept it in good running order. He did…to an extent, but some of the stuff was just junky on it. Of course I didn’t know anything about tractor mowers at the time, and now that I invested the money I’ve learned a lot more about tractor mower repairs than I thought I would.
The machine runs well. It’s cost me a few bucks in parts, but I’ve been able to fix everything myself (with the help of dedicated friends and fam). Was it worth what I paid for it?
I don’t know if there’s ever a completely correct answer to this question (for me). I think it’s always going to be a bit of back and forth and wondering and comparing.
Maybe that’s just capitalism.
Maybe I should buy those shirts…
Something I challenge my students to do is understand their own expertise. We’re all experts in something, and usually many things. Sometimes that expertise is as fundamental as our palate or our tastes in music.
I evaluated my own expertise recently. I started a podcasting project with a few friends to see what it was like, how to do it, and just come to understand the medium better. In doing so I had to come up with a topic to podcast about.
I tried two podcasts. One with a friend attempted to go “blue” and explore the funny side of relationships. Of course, neither of us have expertise in comedy, so the blue ended up feeling forced and misplaced. My wife said it sounded like we were kids who were swearing because we could. She was right.
But the podcast didn’t fail because it wasn’t funny. It failed because there was no expertise. Not in comedy, and really the only expertise either of us had in relationships was our own relationships. We ran out of material after a few months.
The other podcast was a comic book and book review podcast that I did solo. It was ok, but I wasn’t enthusiastic about it. That is until I refined the topic to only Harry Potter.
I realized that I am a Harry Potter expert. It’s my niche. My nerd specialty. I know far far too much about the world of Harry Potter, and I read the books series at least once per year.
Once I switched over I felt the passion of expertise. I knew my topic. I had thousands of things to talk about, and I knew right where to find my audience. I had a successful podcast on my hands.
We got the podcast up to 100 downloads per week. That’s not too shabby for a quick and dirty attempt at podcasting. The excitement of the final Harry Potter film helped of course, but the methods would have worked with or without a major event like that.
The podcast ended because of my time commitments elsewhere, but both podcasts were useful experiences. I learned a ton about technology, marketing online, and finding an audience. The audience for both podcasts was not what I expected. Learned some lessons there.
So, what are you an expert in? How can you leverage your expertise to help you build experiences? Maybe my Harry Potter knowledge won’t ever help me build relationships for small businesses, but my experience podcasting sure will.
-Andy
Twitter: @andyboyan
G+: Andy Boyan
ps - there are still 2 podcasts going at the Supervillain.me network. Nerdfun and Gamefun. They talk about just what it sounds like. Check them out!
It’s a place on the internet. A place for nerds.
You see, in the modern world there is simply too much going on to be a nerd. Unless you are a professional blogger or podcaster who makes their living talking about and writing about your obsession, it’s practically impossible to stay up to date with every video game, ever comic book, every movie, every bit of Harry Potter minutia, every every.
That’s where Supervillain.me comes in.
We are not professionals. We are nerds. Just some fellas who got together to talk about stuff we like.
The idea arose from Kevin Smith starting a podcast network and giving his friends a podcast. It occurred to us, if we did that we would have internet content to read and listen to. On top of that, I get my friends’ opinions on the things they and I like.
That’s the key - it’s not a professional opinion, it’s not a celebrity opinion, it’s not someone who lives 1000 miles’ away’s opinion. It’s my friend’s opinion. And I can go and talk to him and chew him out when he disagrees with me.
The idea of SV.me is that. Fun. Talking. Friends.
And to make it fun, here and there we get some imaginary friends involved.
I said it was for nerds didn’t I?
